A good cry!

Warning...you are about to read the ramblings of a weepy pregnant woman!!!

So, two of my good friends have had their babies in the last couple of days (congrats Amber and Breann!). As I have read their blogs and looked at the beautiful hospital pictures, I can't help but get weepy! Last night as I was laying in bed and thinking about this, I of course, started to cry. A silent cry...the kind you do when your hubby is laying beside you! I was crying because I just can't wait...I can't wait to meet her, hold her, love her, kiss her...and I keep thinking, "Ok...15 more weeks - that's not really too long in the big scheme of things, right?"

But of course, being pregnant and emotional, one thought led to another...

I remembered crying myself to sleep 12, 13, 14 years ago because I longed to have a child and it just wasn't happening. This crying myself to sleep went on for years...not just weeks :)

I then remembered crying because we found out we'd been chosen by a beautiful young girl to be the parents of the precious girl that she was carrying. This time I cried with happiness, gratitude, love. Then the day came that we brought our little Karlee home...ok, yep, I cried some more. More tears of gratitude and happiness. But also tears of sorrow, sorrow for Karlee's birthmother and the pain that she was undoubtedly going through.

Fast forward 2 years...more crying myself to sleep. We found out that we were going to be blessed again, this time with a baby boy! More tears of gratitude and happiness. Carson was born and we awaited placement. But it wasn't happening, his birthfather was trying to stop the adoption. Ok, here were some major tears! For 7 days we prayed and cried. And then we cried some more as it all worked out and his beautiful birthmother placed him in our arms. We cried for her and her pain and we wept with pure gratitude for another miracle in our lives.

Of course, there have been so many other times that I've cried myself to sleep. What is it with crying and bedtime? For me, it seems like that's when it always happens! We've experienced our share our joys, trials and triumphs - and had countless cries over them.

So here I am again, pregnant with another miracle. An unexpected, shocking miracle! And now I cry because again, I am overcome with gratitude for the blessings in my life. I cry because I'm hormonal and I cry because, darn it...I just can't wait to bring our little Grace into this world. And ok...I probably cry because, "oh my gosh...I'm starting over again..."

So, I guess this post is more about gratitude than crying. Of course, a good cry never hurt anyone! In fact, I think it's therapeutic! But what it all comes down to is that I am so blessed and so grateful for my blessings! A wonderful husband, 2 beautiful children - (brought to us by a loving Heavenly Father and 2 beautiful, selfless birthmothers), and another miracle growing inside me!